Welcome to the autumnal season and a personal update. I always write this newsletter a few weeks before the Celtic Wheel of the Year turns. When writing the last one, a few weeks before the August 1st Lughnasa holiday, I noted that summer’s end can be bittersweet. For me, the late summer season of 2026, with its beauty and bittersweet nuance will forever be unforgettable. Right before the Lughnasa celebrations, my 96-year-old, very spunky mom, Ginny, reached the end of her life’s journey. Her passing was peaceful and full of grace. Her absence leaves an irreplaceable void, yet her larger than life presence abides. For me, this year’s late summer days have somehow been even more beautiful and poignant. Finding solace in the slanted sun, the vibrant mountain wildflowers, and crystal-clear night skies, reflections on mom’s life and death have brought me peace and a wider view of things that matter: creating and finding beauty in nature; steadfast trust; rooting for the underdog; courage in the face of fear; the value of friendship, generosity, sharing, and caring for others. These were some of mom’s qualities that I aspire to carry on in my own life. I’m so grateful to the Further Shore community for the outpouring of love and support that has made this time less bitter and more sweet.
Now let’s turn our sights to the autumnal equinox, the season when nature shows off her most brilliant colors before closing her eyes for a long winter nap. In the northern hemisphere, September is the month when school’s back in session, football season kicks off, and apples are abundant. Our appetites experience a subtle shift away from summer’s stone fruits, berries, and salads toward roasted root veggies, hearty soups, and stews. This year, the autumnal equinox is Tuesday, September 22, 2026, at 5:05 p.m. (PDT). Seasonal themes of balance, harvesting or gathering, cleansing, creating beauty, and letting go are prevalent. The autumnal season spans the weeks between the equinox and Samhain (Halloween). Its sights, sounds, and smells are glorious. Let’s dive in.
Seasonal Themes and Nuances
Balance – The days are cooler and the nights a bit longer as we head toward the time of equal balance between day and night, light and darkness. My practice is to honor three days prior, the day of, and three days following the equinox. During those days, I reflect on the different areas of life that require balance. Some of mine are about health; contentment versus frustration; alone time and time with people; activity and stillness, work and play. What are some areas in your own life that require balance? Are they in balance? If not, what are some ways to bring the balance back?
Harvest/Gathering – The ancients celebrated the autumnal equinox as the second harvest or middle harvest. Apples and pears are ripe for picking. Root veggies like carrots, onions, potatoes, and yams are harvested before the first hard frost. Oats, barley, wheat, and rye are ready to be gathered and stored or baked into breads, cakes, and cereals. September sweet corn is some of the best. The successful harvest was celebrated by gathering with family, neighbors, and friends to feast and give thanks for the sustenance that would carry them through the winter. In today’s world most of us do not labor in the fields or the orchards. But we can honor the equinox by gathering with others to share a meal and/or words of gratitude for the things that sustain us. Of course, our sustenance includes nourishing foods for the body. But let’s also remember to gather and honor the things that nourish the heart and soul. Authentic relationships, random acts of kindness, time in nature or with companion animals, restful sleep, and listening to or making music are a few examples of things to gather in the season. What are some of yours?
Cleansing– Our culture really leans into the spring clean; it does make sense to want to throw open the windows, clear cobwebs from the rafters, and ash from the fireplace after winter’s bluster settles into spring. But autumn is also a wonderful time for cleansing and clearing home and hearth. The combination of cooler temperatures and shorter days offer a nudge to get going and clean the garage, porch, yard, garden, or other outdoor areas that need attention before winter sets in. In and around the house, packing away summer toys, clothes, grills, and coolers will create space for boots, jackets, shovels, and sleds. September’s Virgoan energy begs us to get organized and clear out the clutter at home. It’s a great time to take an inventory of the attic, closet, or kitchen and donate or sell items that are not in use. Using a sage or palo santo smudge stick can refresh the air and the energy at home. The autumn cleanse helps us to prepare for shorter, colder days and the “Oh, so busy” winter holidays.
Creating Beauty – Although I love all the seasons, to me, autumn is the most beautiful. There are so many transitions taking place within nature herself; the visual changes alone are jaw dropping. The air smells like crisp apples and composting leaves. A deep breath can create a state of euphoria! Trees and shrubs shed their rich green summer cloaks and adorn themselves instead with a flurry of ruby red, yellow gold, and burnt orange finery. Squirrels are putting on a show, arguing about the best place to hide their winter food stash. The hummingbirds hold a feeding frenzy, tiny wings aflutter as they gossip about the best timing to head south. Daytime skies are bluer. At sunset, the blue light scatters, displaying brilliant steaks of red, pink, orange, and purple. In autumn, as mother nature inspires awe, we might ask ourselves, “Is there a way to create more beauty on the inside or on the outside of my life?”
Letting Go – In some ways it is ironic that dying foliage, fallow fields, and the sun’s departure give way to such gob-smacking beauty. I call it the beautiful season of dying. Colorful leaves letting go of tree branches are a visual signal to the season’s end. These autumnal observations can help us with letting go of the ontological clutter taking up space in the body, mind, or heart. Just as cleansing and clearing home and hearth make way for spaciousness and clarity, doing the same for Self has value and helps to restore inner peace and balance. Take an inner inventory. Are there situations, mental or emotional cobwebs to clear; big or little things to let go of; habits to adjust in support of better health or more joy? Be like an autumnal leaf and let go gently. Composting that clutter may take a little time but will eventually give rise to a new cycle or season.
Soothing Sweets for the Season
Further Shore has hosted Death Cafés for hundreds of participants where we gather to discuss death, while enjoying a cuppa alongside a sweet treat. Death Café originated in England where tea and cakes were preferred. As we continue to honor Wayne’s legacy, and in the spirit of Death Café, this year’s newsletter will offer recipes for soothing sweets from the Food Doctor and Friends cookbook. This vegan Apple Pie features autumn’s all-star fruit with a warm spice combination and a touch of sweetness. Serve right out of the oven alongside a mug of hot apple cider.
- 3 cups pastry flour
- ½ cup oil
- ¾ cup water
- 8 large apples
- 2 tsp. cinnamon
- ½ tsp. nutmeg
- ½ tsp. ginger
- ¼ cup Earth Balance
- 1 T. maple syrup
- ½ cup sugar
Mix together flour, oil and water. Form into ball and chill 30 minutes. Cut dough in half and roll out to fit pie plate. Place cored, peeled, sliced apples into pie plate. Mix remaining ingredients together and evenly sprinkle on top of apples. Place other pie shell on top. Pinch together edges. Cut slits on top. Bake at 350° until juices start to bubble through slits.
Graceful Grief – Part 6 – Acceptance Further Shore was founded in 2005 with the mission to provide resources and education for living well and dying with dignity. Grief is an abiding theme when one is faced with loss of any kind, catastrophic illness, the dying process, and the eventuality of death. This section of the newsletter explores the ways grief can influence life’s relationships, experiences, and choices and to reveal grace and resilience within its challenging aspects. Previous newsletters featured Anticipatory Grief, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, and Depression. Use your journal or sit down with a friend to talk about these concepts. See below for details about Graceful Grief, a virtual companion workshop to this writing.
DABDA Model for Grief ~ The acronym, “DABDA” references five stages of grief made famous by the renowned Swiss American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. DABDA stands for Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. This season’s topic is Acceptance.
Grief-Related Acceptance Features
- The acceptance stage of grief goes beyond awareness or acknowledgement of loss. It is an ontological state of accepting the anticipated loss or that loss has already occurred.
- Loss-acceptance can occur in tandem with other stages of grief and includes a unique juxtaposition between readiness to explore a new reality while releasing or letting go of the previous one.
- Acceptance does not indicate approval of the loss; that we are “over” the loss, are “ok” with it; have “moved on”; or that the new reality is enjoyable or preferrable. It simply means accepting the loss as real.
- The acceptance stage of grief does not indicate the absence of suffering; the first or earliest experience of loss-acceptance can include acute suffering that will soften and change with time.
Acceptance Notes for Hospice Caregivers
- When a patient accepts that they are in final days, there are a myriad of thoughts and feelings in process. The patient is literally saying goodbye to everything in life and saying hello to a great unknown.
- Recognize that not everyone in the care circle will be comfortable with the patient’s acceptance of death’s inevitability. Allow for and be respectful of feelings that are different from your own. Be mindful of personal grief patterns and seek counseling if needed.
- Follow the patient’s lead and honor their requests for physical care, conversation or quiet time, a clean, safe environment, comfort, privacy, and dignity.
- Avoid projecting personal agendas for the patient’s recovery or longevity. Pressuring the patient to participate in daily activities or conversations about these things can result in their feeling anxiety, frustration, despair, or shame. Instead, hold space, bear witness, remain present, offer comfort and care.
Acceptance Notes for Self
- When experiencing personal loss, acceptance does not mean that you like the new reality or are even “ok” with it. It means you’re aware of the loss and accept that it is real.
- Be aware that thoughts, feelings, and behaviors associated with the other stages of grief may arise while navigating the new reality.
- A “letting go” ceremony can help to release suffering that may accompany loss acceptance and clarify intentions for the future.
- Faith-based or devotional practices such as chanting, mindfulness meditation, or gratitude rituals, can increase a sense of peace with the new reality.
- Record or repeat affirmations, such as, I am grateful for and open to this new reality.
- Repeating negative thoughts or persistent feelings of guilt, remorse, shame, or self-harm indicate a need for professional counseling and/or medical support.
Finding Grace ~ Grief-related acceptance is a natural response to past or future loss of any kind. The acceptance stage of grief opens an invitation to explore new activities, routines, and relationships supportive of a happy life. Yet, pursuing those things may evoke feelings of guilt, remorse, confusion, or inner conflict. This is a very normal, human response to loss. Give yourself grace! Mindful exploration of new experiences, new things to be grateful for or to hope for can provide a starting point toward more comfort, ease, and inner peace. A tried-and-true practice for finding grace at this stage is the Serenity Prayer. “God (goddess, spirit, universe, higher mind) grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Acceptance Prompts ~ Am I anticipating or have I recently experienced a loss that results in a new reality? Have I fully accepted the loss and the new reality? If I have accepted it, am I experiencing other stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression) alongside the acceptance? What are the feelings that accompany the loss and/or the new reality? Is there something I can change about the loss itself or my reaction to it? What might be useful to aspire to or hope for going forward?
Graceful Grief – Session #6 Acceptance – this virtual program takes a “silver lining” approach and is open to those who are interested in deepening the grief experience to find more grace and peace. The workshop expands on these concepts to include education, coping strategies, meditation, journaling, and dialogue for shared empathy and healing. This season’s topic is Acceptance. It will be held on Saturday, October 24, 2026, from 10:00-11:30 a.m. (PDT/AZ) on the Zoom platform. Space limited to 6 participants on first come basis. Registration required by October 21, 2026, via emailing aleia@furthershore.org to secure your place. Freely offered; donations to Further Shore are appreciated but not required. Visit the Further Shore Calendar for future Graceful Grief workshops. Private sessions for this material are available on request.
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On the Blog: “Y” is for Yes, Parts 1-4 now available in the ABC’s for Living Well.
Quotes for Season:
“Autumn glows upon us like a splendid evening. It is the very sunset of the year.” ~ Mary Russell Mitford, Poet, Novelist
“Fall is proof that change is beautiful.” ~ author unknown
“Finding beauty in a broken world is acknowledging that beauty leads us to our deepest and highest selves” ~ Terry Tempest Williams, Author, Activist